Sunday, February 7, 2010

Death, relief and fight

What seemed to be a normal delivery, wasn’t and Aravind’s struggle with life started soon. Aravind, my cousin (chitti/mausi’s first son), as an infant seemed all normal for the whole family, but my maternal grandma (as well as Aravind’s) was quick to note the problems and forewarned. Lack of oxygen for certain seconds during the delivery was identified as the culprit. It started with delayed milestones but the seizure attack complicated the things. Seeing the CT scan report, an expert doctor gave only 12 years. With seizure attacks getting longer, his walk dwindled to limping and then to dragging on the floor. He would still rush in joy dragging his things and legs on the floor. Speech never developed but he had deep liking for music and he used to hum and sing the opening phrases of songs such as, “urvasi..urvasi”. He keenly followed cricket too; it was “balla takka” for him. If delhi was bad for him, bangalore’s climate did him. But he had the chance of attending spastic school upto certain age in bangalore, which proved better for him and his mother. The climate of madras and trichy suited him best from cold and cough point of view. The walk was totally gone and it was purely buggy ride for him.

While his maternal grandma doted on him, his paternal grandparents only displayed formal affection so much so that his paternal grandma mocked at his style of walking at one stage. She now, is at the same stage of limping with knees gone.

Soon the buggy ride too stopped and he was confined to bed only after thigh fracture. He was successful in defeating the ventilator too but succumbed to pneumonia; he had some difficulty in breathing and his mother assumed that it was due to cold which was a normal feature with him. She stepped out to buy some ayurvedic medicine and he faded away forever with mouth opened and eyes half-open. She was inconsolable that she was not besides him till the time it was told to her that the boy had seen vishwa rupam of the lord going by the status of eyes and mouth and further that it was raatha saptami day, the day for which bhisma (of mahabharata fame) waited to give his life. The boy’s younger brother, aged 7, observed – anna would be born in a much better family and shall be better than him.

The immediate reaction of near and dear ones was that it was an escape from suffering, endured for nineteen years, both for the kid and parents. I am sure that this birth was necessitated to off-set some karma of previous births. Very often my maternal grandpa, a tax-practitioner by profession, wished that he be born in a para-bhramam state, owing to accounts and figures.

Soon, the focus shifted to rites and rituals. The paternal side was keen on doing-away with formalities owing to non-belief and cost factor. Indeed, the boy’s paternal grandma sobbed on 14th day that Rs. 65,000/- had been wasted on silly procedures. The vaadhiyaar, who gave a moral lecture on the first day, skipped the 9th day rites and clubbed the same with 10th day. The boy’s father and paternal grandma even refused to keep the stone at the house and entrusted the same to the vaadhiyaar. Meanwhile, maternal grandma and my mom were very much upset with vaadhiyaar’s tactics; for them pithru saabam should not be earned.

Amidst all this, erupted fight too on the third day itself; my dad advised my chitti to go for some job and praised her before the maamiyaar (mother-in-law-boy’s paternal grandma). This was not taken in the right spirit by mil and hue and cry was raised over degrading her son, who has history of not sticking to even one job and remains a sales executive at the age of 45 years. My mom relayed this fight news over phone when I was watching vaaranam aayiram at my aunt’s place. Indeed, it was war-ranam-aayiram there (thousand words causing war and ranam). This closely resembled the fight over uruma in one of the raadhika’s serial, though not in scale.

Everybody is back at their place and I believe that the departed soul too is liberated from the cycle of punarapi jananam punarapi maranam.

No comments:

Post a Comment